Rebel with NO Cause!

See that cutie with his Dad; all dressed up in his Sunday best? Have you ever laid eyes on a more innocent, sweet, naive lad?

Let's be honest, his father and I have created a monster! this little man has the spirit of a Tiger. He has the heart of a Trojan. He is as lovable as a teddy bear! BUT he is truly his Father's son. In every way he aspires to be "just like Dad". They are like twinkies of a different size...packaged together!

Recently Gavin set some goals. There were things he wanted and he determined to have them at any cost. For several weeks Gavin saved every penny. He worked hard around the house and stowed away every cent that he could. Every day he would pull out the piggy bank and recount. He kept telling everyone about the MP3 player that he had seen. Just a tad longer and it was his! Every chore that he performed brought him a little closer to the goal. It was gratifying to watch. I was amazed at his perseverance. He worked untiring and his little 8 year old spirit never ceased. I couldn't help but think there are adults that could learn from him!

Just a few months ago he would have taken that money to town and bought the latest bakugan or a water gun or maybe even new bike accessories. An MP3 player was merely a step up. I smiled as I thought about "boys and their toys".

But guess what? All of a sudden my sweet son decided to assert his manliness! And

overnight everything changed. The money he saved did not buy a MP3 player. He became an

instant rebel.

I think I will blame this on his father. Afterall, rebellion is certainly NOT in my nature! :-)

First of all the music player became a BB gun! This with the understanding that he needed to keep the birds out of our fruit trees. And no shooting with other children there. Along with a list of safety rules he readily accepted. Just look at that smile. He was very agreeable and complying.

The innocent face remained!

....at least for a few days.

Now you need to understand the "father-son" relationship shared between this boy and his father. When they have nothing to do they watch the knife channel!! Do you know about the knife channel? It is nothing more than a shopping channel for knives. They can sit and admire those silly knives for hours on end. Sometimes they just mute the television and watch like a couple of redneck insurgents on the revolt. Gavin has become so adept that he can tell you an approximate cost before they put it on the screen...and he is only 8!

My husband has a special drawer where his knife arsenal is kept. Knifes of every kind. And this is like a playhouse for my son. He will take out every knife; and there are MANY, and lay them out on the table and drool!

So it was no surprise when he decided that he needed to spend money on a machete.

So now my pure and spotless child has become somewhat of a rebel; albeit an adorable one. He has no cause. He just loves the man his father is. Fortunately so do I.

Pictures of Gavin with his weapons require a practiced look of dissent. It's a guy thing!

But I must say, I certainly hope this new look is only a phase!

In our footsteps...

This is my incredible son and his incredible sons. I remember like yesterday the day Pete was born. He was my first. Since as far back as I can remember all I wanted was to be a mother and so when they put him in my arms the first time...I was in paradise!
Unfortunately for Pete, I was young and pretty hard on him. He survived my trial-and-error-lack-of-guidebook parenting. He also survived the tumultous and sometimes nasty fighting that went on between his father and me. Things were quite often wild, outlandish, and difficult. There was a picture of my husband and me next to the word dysfunction in the dictionary.
Don't misunderstand...we had good times too. The fights, however, were extreme. And often. I remember Pete having lots of nightmares when he was very little. My father in law told me they probably occurred because he witnessed his dad and I fighting alot. Perhaps he was right.
We divorced when Pete was twelve. By that time there were three other children. They all adjusted positively and became healthy adults and members of society. I am very proud of them.
Before Pete got married he expressed a concern that his marriage could end up like mine. I assured him that divorce was not genetic! He could make it work. We talked at length about marriage, responsibility, about putting God into the relationship; about give and take, about learning from the mistakes of our own parents.
Nonetheless, today my heart is aching for my son. My heart is sad for two little boys and their dad. My concerns involve a son who is getting divorced.
I think of all the times I could cover his boo boos with bandaids. I recall a five year old coming home from Kindergarten upset that some other children made fun of him. I could fix it with homemade cookies. When he was six he woke me one morning singing in my ear, "My buddy, my buddy and me..." We made it through Jr. High and puberty...together. Even when he was nineteen he emailed "Mom" with a serious concern. Together we found reassurance and peace.
But once again Satan's ploys and tactics have destroyed one of our greatest assets. The family. And it is my son's. No amount of bandaids, cookies or singing will fix it. And while his heart aches, mine does too. A mother's heartache is quite often not her own. I would speculate that the pain our children go through is harder on us than our own. Much much harder.
Fortunately, I also believe in a loving Heavenly Father that can heal and mend our broken hearts, that hears and answers our heartfelt prayers and that will be there for my son, Pete, when I cannot. Whoever said once "Life is a long lesson in humility" was so right.